Late round draft pick from a big time school. California born and bred. Promising size and skills, but demoted to back-up for most of his college career. Better career numbers in his senior year of high school than in college and the NFL combined. Never started a meaningful game in his life. Just waiting for his chance to step up and take the reigns on a team with an established star, and in one heart-stopping moment, he's thrust into the spotlight.
Meet Matt Cassell: The Fourth Best Quarterback in the Country.
Why is he the fourth best? Two reasons. First, The Opinionator has been looking forward to the 2008 Patriots season since Ellis Hobbs Incredibly Incapable Iritator (or III) fell trying to cover Plaxico Burress. Second, He happened to back up the only three quarterbacks in the world who are better then him...until now!
Carson Palmer: Heisman Trophy winner, professional Quarterback. Matt Leinert: Heisman Trophy winner, professional Quarterback. Tom Brady: Man-God, Stetson Model, Comedian, TV/Movie Star, Three Time Super Bowl Champion, Two Time Superbowl MVP, Reigning League MVP, Record Holder, Mr. Giselle, professional Quarterback. Is Matt Cassell a career backup who has never started a game because he's just not that good, or is it just a matter of unfortunate chance that he has backed up the only three players in the universe who are better than him?
Meet The Opinionator: Former Desperate Patriots Fan
Why is he formerly desperate? Two Reasons. First, The Opinionator has been looking forward to the 2008 Patriot's season since Ellis Hobbs I can't believe I ever had faith in the Idiot (or III) fell trying to cover Plaxico Burress. Second, The Opinionator has found a sliver of hope to cling on to instead of thinking about a hit that shredded both a left ACL and any chance of another Patriots run at a Super Bowl.
So here comes Matt Cassell to save the day. Here comes another career back up, slipping onto the scene to carry the broken hearts of a nation. Here comes the new Tom Brady, begging you with subtle advertisements to try it out simply by clicking on the little link at the top of the page, only to find out that there isn't a choice at all, and in a few weeks they're going to continue the My Spacing of...quarterbacks by making the new Tom Brady the only option. Here comes another happy ending to what was potentially a catastrophic moment, and Phuket, it won't cost more than 5 Thai bahts...or so I've heard.
Andrew
Hope Holder and the Opinionator
Monday 8 September 2008
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